Do you really want to be Julie McCoy?

If you remember The Love Boat, you probably remember Julie McCoy. Her job was to make sure everyone always had something to do.

Summer has a way of turning parents into Julie McCoy.

Last week, we talked about the value of boredom. This week, let’s look at what happens next.

“What are we doing today?”
“Can we go somewhere?”
“What’s next?”

Before you know it, you’re planning every hour while your child waits for the next activity.

In last week’s post, we suggested waiting a few more minutes before stepping in. That’s still good advice. But if your child comes back with, “I can’t think of anything,” stay strong and resist the urge to do the thinking for them.

Ask what ideas they’ve already considered, even if they seem wacky or unrealistic. Ask what they could do with what they already have. The ideas are there. They just need practice finding and using them. Ask them to give it a little more thought before coming back to you.

What we’re really teaching is problem-solving. We’re teaching our children to think through a challenge before looking to someone else for the answer.

Children don’t become independent because we have all the answers. They become independent because we give them opportunities to find their own.